Can Two People Really Have a Good Divorce?

Can two people ever really have a good divorce?

That’s an excellent question and I think something that many people in this age when so many people get divorced really aspire to, and it’s really interesting. A few years ago, I had a case in which I represented the husband and the wife of the couple said in conversation, “You know, I really thought that my husband and I would be known for how we were married, but it turns out we’re going to be known for how we were divorced,” and what she meant was that they were going to be able to work together in their divorce to raise their young child together in a way in which they gave each other a lot of flexibility, a lot of opportunities, and they really were able to raise this child together and enjoy her as if they were fully engaged as co-parents even though they weren’t married and both moved on to additional relationships in the future. That’s what she meant by a good divorce.

What does a good divorce mean to anybody? I think it differs from people to people, but I think that’s basically the underlying premise that we will continue to maintain and honor the relationship that we’ve had, honor the children, enjoy them together, be able to go to weddings and births, dance together at our daughter’s wedding, whatever it is that we’ll be able to continue to enjoy these things together, to continue to be there for each other as parents and maybe even as friends going forward, but to transition out of the marital relationship into something completely different.