Kids & divorce
It’s not always necessary to tell your kids the whole truth about your divorce. Imagine a situation where you’re with your children, your phone rings, and it’s your husband’s girlfriend or your wife’s boyfriend’s spouse. You learn that your spouse, whom you previously thought was wonderful, has been unfaithful from the very beginning. Suddenly, the idyllic marriage you believed you had is revealed to be a lie, and now your marriage is over.
Your children are in pain and feeling angry—angry at you and at your spouse. You don’t want them to blame you for something that wasn’t your fault; you want them to understand that the marriage ended due to the actions of the other person. However, consider the impact of this on them.
It’s important to tell your children the truth about your marriage and divorce, but it’s equally vital for them to hear an authentic story from you. Remember, your children are half you and half your spouse; they embody both the good and the bad qualities of both parents. When they hear you express anger or criticize their other parent, it can lead them to feel bad about themselves and question their own worth.
You want your children to feel good about themselves, especially during a divorce. Therefore, try to craft a narrative that feels authentic but avoids being overly critical. Strive to maintain a relationship where both parents can support the children and be wonderful figures in their lives. That’s the balance of truth you want to achieve.
It’s not always necessary to tell your kids the whole truth about your divorce. Imagine a situation where you’re with your children, your phone rings, and it’s your husband’s girlfriend or your wife’s boyfriend’s spouse. You learn that your spouse, whom you previously thought was wonderful, has been unfaithful from the very beginning. Suddenly, the idyllic marriage you believed you had is revealed to be a lie, and now your marriage is over.
Your children are in pain and feeling angry—angry at you and at your spouse. You don’t want them to blame you for something that wasn’t your fault; you want them to understand that the marriage ended due to the actions of the other person. However, consider the impact of this on them.
It’s important to tell your children the truth about your marriage and divorce, but it’s equally vital for them to hear an authentic story from you. Remember, your children are half you and half your spouse; they embody both the good and the bad qualities of both parents. When they hear you express anger or criticize their other parent, it can lead them to feel bad about themselves and question their own worth.
You want your children to feel good about themselves, especially during a divorce. Therefore, try to craft a narrative that feels authentic but avoids being overly critical. Strive to maintain a relationship where both parents can support the children and be wonderful figures in their lives. That’s the balance of truth you want to achieve.