Mediation & The Law

A lot of people considering divorce are interested in mediation as a way to work out their differences and reach an amicable resolution. Many wonder, how does the law fit into the mediation process? I’m Katherine Miller, and I’ve been a divorce attorney and mediator in New York City, New York State, and Connecticut for over 30 years. Let me share my perspective on this.

Not all mediators agree on this, but from my point of view, the law is a crucial aspect of the reality you face, and you should be aware of it. It would be distressing to one or both parties to discover that the law differs from what you’ve agreed to after the fact, even if it’s before you sign an agreement that formalizes your decisions. Finding out about the law too late in the process can be disruptive and derailing.

Here are a few key points to consider:

  1. Understanding Your Rights: The law allows you to make your own choices within broad parameters for resolving your issues. It provides directives for courts on how they should handle similar cases, but it doesn’t dictate how you should resolve your particular situation.
  2. The Concept of Fairness: The law aims to be fair, but “fair” can be subjective. What one person considers fair might differ from another’s perspective. Statutes and case law guide courts on handling various situations, but you can craft a resolution that makes sense for both of you.
  3. Personal Priorities: The law is just one factor to consider in mediation or any negotiation. Your personal priorities and what makes sense to you might be more important than the considerations of a judge.

If you have more questions about mediation, feel free to call my office—we’d be happy to discuss it with you. Thanks for listening.