Empowering Families

What is custody? It’s a term that often feels intimidating and carries significant weight in a divorce, but understanding it is crucial. I’m Katherine Miller, and I’ve been a divorce attorney in New York City and New York State for over 30 years. Let’s break down what custody really means.

Custody is divided into two main parts:

1. Physical Custody: This refers to the parenting plan—the logistics of where the children will be and when. It covers the regular schedule of weekdays and weekends, as well as special times such as holidays, vacations, and birthdays. Essentially, physical custody is about the day-to-day routine of where the children live and who they’re with at different times.

2. Legal Custody: This is a bit more complex. Legal custody involves decision-making about the children’s lives. It’s not about daily choices like what socks to wear or what’s for dinner but rather significant decisions such as:

• Who will be the children’s doctors?
• What schools will they attend?
• Will they receive therapy or other special services?
• Are there any rules regarding tattoos or piercings?
• What are the curfew rules, and will they be consistent between households?
• How will discipline be handled, and will it be enforced across both homes?
• What about driving rules and the responsibilities associated with it?

These decisions can become even more complex as children grow older and face new challenges.